Prophet Muhammad (Peace Be Upon Him And His Progeny): “Serving the family is considered to be expiation for major sins. It will quench the Lord’s wrath, and be considered as the nuptial gift for the ‘Houris’ [women in heaven]. It will be a cause of raised ranks, and increased, recorded good-deeds.” (Jami’ al-Sa’adat, v.2, p.142)
As you know opposite-sex attraction is a God given natural instinct in human beings. After reaching puberty, boys and girls are attracted to each other. Because of this need and the natural instinct is that in Islam, marriage is ordered. The husband and wife build a structure upon love, comfort and delight and they promise to each other that this relationship will last to the end of their life. But what is needed to fulfill this promise?
According to Islam, love and mercy are two main factors for the strength of marriage building and the relationship between husband and wife. The Holy Quran says:“And among His signs is that He created for you mates from among yourselves that ye may dwell in tranquility with them. And he has put love and mercy between your (hearts): Verily in that are Signs for those who reflect.” (3:21)
In fact, love and mercy constitute the glue and cement for the structure of a family. A life without love and mercy is a shaky life, ready to break apart. But if the life of a couple is filled with tranquility, is based on love, and is accompanied by mercy, it is firmly established.
Remember that according Holy Quran, putting love and mercy between the hearts of couple will be done by God. So, always pray for them.
The marriage and establishment of family is the best way to prevent adultery and the corruption of the society. The husband and wife build a home upon love, comfort and delight in which the couple shall live together their whole life, and raise boys and girls to continue the human society. This structure is only firm if both of husband and wife know about the mutual rights. Here we are going to write about the rights of wife.
Imam Sajjad (the fourth Imam of Muslims) said:
“And the right of your wife is that you should know that God has made her a repose, a comfort and a companion, and a protector for you. It is incumbent upon each of you to thank God for the other and realize that the other one is God’s blessing for you. It is obligatory to be a good companion for God’s blessing, and to honor her and treat her gently… She should enjoy the rights of mercy and intimacy, as she is an object of tranquility. You should care for her through consummation of the lust that must be consummated. And that is surely great. And there is no power but in God.(The Treatise on Rights, right n.20)
The human eye is like other tools. It means if we use it correctly the result will be good and vice versa. We are not allowed to use our eyes as we wish, as we are not allowed to use a knife to injure or kill others. Hence, prohibited items must be known to avoid committing them. For example it is forbidden to look at unfamiliar (Na-Mahram) women. It does not mean that we should close our eyes completely since then we cannot walk or we might fall down on the ground, but it means we can reduce the amount that we see by limiting our view. Imam Sadiq (the sixth Imam of Muslims) said:“One look after another will sow the seeds of desire in the heart, and it is sufficient temptation for the person.”(Wasa’il al-Shi’ah, v.14, p.139)
A dirty look will also tear down the veils of modesty and chastity. There are many people whose life is ruined due to a dirty look. Only for instance it can be said that dirty look of a married man at unfamiliar (Na-Mahram) woman or girl will sow the seeds of desire in his heart and he will be in love with her gradually and it can ruin the family. And it is also forbidden for women because the same reason.
We should remember that dirty look, is a major reason for the spread of adultery.